He made me lookat myself and brought attention to how I looked and was dressed before Ianswered. At first I was slow. I explained about my periodic c...ossdressing. How Janine knew but thought I stopped. I recounted how hiswife affected me when I first met her. How profound these things wereand new. As I went on it became easier to say, things seemed to justflow out of me like a river. I told him all about the first night in hishome. Janine having to stay in New York. I even explained the. .... huh, huh, huh......think I might die......huh, huh, huh.” Carter held him tightly and, smiling to himself, said, “no, you're not going to die. It may feel that way, but I would never let that happen to you.” He held Daniel closely and nuzzled into his neck until it was clear that he had recovered. Before the inevitable after-orgasm regret and doubt set in, he pulled Daniel's underwear and pants back up, making sure everything was closed. Wrapping his arms around him, Carter whispered,. I feel warmth and love flowing out of him. Even if he is disappointed that I wont talk about my fears he will at least try to sooth them. I hug him tighter still."There are many things I can not begin to say, to myself much less to you Saul." I say softly into his chest. "this is a help, though, but I can think of other thing that are even more comforting."Saul gives a me a gentle kiss on my forehead and then slowly moves down my check to my mouth. Tipping my mouth up I can kiss him back. Soft. This wasn't received well by him. Or our parents. Or the principle. Turns out that throwing eggs at the coach's house because, "You don't like being told what to do", isn't a good enough reason, and will get you suspended from the girl's basketball team for a few games. But that's Rachel. She's never been one to follow the rules, even the rules she agreed to participate by. I first noticed that Rachel was a girl when we were still young. It might sound strange that when you're a kid you don't.
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